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Yech, indeed.

02/04/07, by Kristen Email 1892 views • Categories: Food, Food News

Earlier this week, I started writing my weekly post. I'd recently found a site of "kid-friendly recipes" and the idea kinda grated on me. "My kid is not an alien whose peculiar tastes must be appeased," my first draft said. "I would no more write a post on kid-friendly recipes as I would write one on husband-friendly recipes, or second-cousin-friendly recipes."

I admit, some of this post — maybe even a lot of it — was going to be me tooting my own horn over how I've cultivated a kid who prides herself on the range of foods she likes; she'll gladly tell you all about the foods she hated — when she was "a little dude" — that she now loves.

However, yesterday, my husband asked, "Hey, did you see this article in The New York Times about kids and food?" I admitted I had not and sat down to read These Kids Never Say ‘Yech!’

The more I read, the angrier I became. Until finally I got to...

Mr. Yeomans wrote proudly about giving his daughter, Zelda, 1, steak at 8 months.

...at which point, I blurted out, "What kind of asshole prides themselves on feeding an eight-month old baby steak?!"

I got up, stormed around in disgust for a little while, and then sat back down and scrapped my post, not wanting my post — my kid — being thought of as part of this "gastrokid" business.

For those of you without kids, let me tell you: with the one exception of your kids spontaneously telling you they love you, nothing is as sweet as when your kids love something you share with them: a family traditions, a movie, a food, whatever.

However, if, like Eric Ripert, the chef at Le Bernardin, you are giving your child a burger "medium-rare — the only way real food snobs will eat it" (and making your child sick as a result), I don't care what your intentions are, you have just crossed past sharing something you love with your kid into forcing your wants onto your kids at their cost.

I'm not going use this post to dole out my personal parenting philosophy, but I will say this: my kid isn't a lump of clay to be formed into my own image. She's a person. A small, illogical, and very inexperienced person, but a person nonetheless, with her own tastes and preferences.

And that's what really irritates me about this whole gastrokid thing.

Exposing your kids to food means exposing them to all foods — not just foods that meet with some "badge of urban sophisticate honor" criteria you approve of. I made a decision when my kid was a baby to trust her to make her own choices whenever possible: what she wears, what she watches on TV, and yes, what she eats.

Does this mean she always chooses the foods I would want her to pick? Of course not. But it doesn't mean she lives on pizza and ice cream, either. Because we've never set up a Good Food vs. Forbidden Food dichotomy, she's not obligated to stuff herself with less-healthy foods whenever she gets the opportunity. She understands there's Food That Makes You Grow and Food That Doesn't Make You Grow — because what kid doesn't want to grow bigger? — and although I sometimes intervene on the behalf of Food That Makes You Grow, on the whole, she strikes a healthy balance between the two.

And, believe it or not, so-called "gastroparents": she somehow learned this all without the help of some $40-a-session "Mini Chef" lesson. So, we'll see how this whole gastrokid crap shakes out in twenty years when your kids, now young adults away from your watchful eye, making their own decisions, are now gorging themselves on all the tasty, forbidden McDonalds and Kraft Mac & Cheese you denied them all those years...

As always, for more snarky remarks from me, visit my blog at http://gezellig-girl.com.


Comments, Pingbacks:

Comment from: Stacey [Visitor]
Wow, I've always been proud of my daughter (age 4) being willing to eat new things - but this really takes things to a new level. I can understand wanting to introduce new flavors, and to avoid the mac-n-cheese/pizza/chicken fingers trap so many parents find themselves in, but to do so at the risk of a child's health is unfortunate.

That said, I do think it's neat that my daughter is a maniac for sushi, and also that she prefers vegetables and fruit to almost any other food choice... none of this is from my coaching, though, it's just the way she came. And along with it, she likes nasty "juice boxes" (HFCS and water!!!), Cheetos, candy, etc as much as the next ordinary kid. Going out to dinner is equally a treat, for her, whether our destination is the sushi bar or McDonald's.

I guess my feeling is that it's fine to introduce them to the gourmet stuff, as long as we, as parents, remember that they're individuals, with their own minds and tastes, and let them develop accordingly, at their own pace. All this MiniChef stuff reeks of the pre-K flashcards and other yuppie parenting tactics that were so mocked in the 80s and 90s.
PermalinkPermalink 02/04/07 @ 13:50
Comment from: Sherri [Visitor]
Maybe you could *** or #*$+!@ certain words?
PermalinkPermalink 02/04/07 @ 17:50
Comment from: Scott at Real Epicurean [Visitor] · http://www.realepicurean.com
I'm both for and against your views...

There needs to be certain cultural changes (perhaps retrospectively) to bring kids out of their current "lack of respect" ideology - but I'm not sure if that's quite relative or not.

Or maybe I'm just confused :p
PermalinkPermalink 02/04/07 @ 18:52
Comment from: George [Visitor]
My daughter, at age seven, is willing to try virtially any food. She has her favorites and, from time to time, will request foods that seem strange coming from the mouth of a seven year old.

I think the biggest thing to bear in mind is that the taste buds of kids are infinitely stronger than those of adults. That cheddar cheese you like may just be too much for your little one.

I say, expose the kids to many cuisines and flavors and let them make their choices. You may be surprised.
PermalinkPermalink 02/05/07 @ 05:57
Comment from: ashamanja babu [Visitor]
I think you may be overlooking a couple key elements in this issue. First of all, there is the health issue. Very small children may not understand nutritional balance yet and may not make their food choices based on what is good for them but on what tastes good, and that isn't always the best. It doesn't matter if they rebel at age 15 and eat fast food; the developmental years are where nutrition is even more important.

Secondly, apart from a small number of haughty gourmet yuppies, I think most people weo want to expose their children to high-quality food do so not only because they want to help the young person develop a broad palate, but also because they only want to have to cook ONE dinner per evening, and they themselves do not want to eat fishsticks, mac and cheese, hot pockets, or any other "kid-friendly" food every night. In addition, a lot of these same people do want to dispel the myth that there is such a thing as "kid food" as opposed to real food. That doesn't mean feeding babies steak, it means feeding children normal food, the food that their parents eat, at the age that is appropriate for them.

Third, even despite the heath issue, do you really think children ought to be making these descisions for themsleves? Don't you think that allowing your children the freedom to choose food or other things on their own, perhaps recklessly, is another form of "forcing your wants onto your kids at their cost"? Perhaps you want to feel like you are nurturing their independant thought and growth, but is this really the best thing for them at very young ages? It does not necessarily follow that choosing one's dinner at age four will make a person into an independant thinker at age 30. Wouldn't it be more beneficial to teach children that they can't always have what they want, that there are consequences to every action, and that they need to be aware of the people around them, not just themselves?

I once read about a conversation between a macrobiotic instructor and a woman who could not get her 2 year old child to wean. His advice? Basically, he asked her "Who is the mother and who is the child?"

Please don't think this is criticism; I enjoyed your article. It made me think.
PermalinkPermalink 02/06/07 @ 06:32
Comment from: Laura M [Visitor]
I do not understand how you make the leap in logic that feeding medium-rare hamburger to a child is the same as making your child sick. Your veganism aside, there is no evidence that meat (raw or cooked) will make one sick...unless we're assuming it's industrial, mass produced meat.
PermalinkPermalink 02/06/07 @ 17:36
Comment from: Kristen [Member] Email · http://www.gezellig-girl.com
A.) I'm not vegan. I was. I haven't been for years.

B.) The NYTimes article stated the meat made Eric Ripert's child sick:

Mr. Ripert admitted he learned a lesson when he offered his son, Adrien, now 3, a burger that was medium-rare — the only way real food snobs will eat it — at 18 months.

“I didn’t want him to have meat well done his whole life,” Mr. Ripert explained. “The nanny said, ‘You don’t do that for a baby.’ I did it. He got sick. Since then we have been reluctant with red meat. I do spaghetti Bolognese and he loves that. But no steak yet.”
PermalinkPermalink 02/06/07 @ 17:48

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